Garden {or, Because Love Needs Cultivating}

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Today is Valentines Day.

I could so effortlessly write a million things about how unconditionally and sacrificially someone loves me, all the time. How his heart makes me catch my breath and it sometimes still catches me off guard the way he lives I love you.

It's the plain truth, but there's more to it than that.

Because you only fall in love once, at the beginning, and it's wonderful but it really doesn't take any effort. It's after you've fallen in love, and after the engagement and starry-eyed wedding planning and the I do's, when you realize love needs cultivating, and energy and effort and work.

Did I know that marriage is work, a year and a half ago, on our wedding day? Yes . . . except it's one of those things in life that you have to actually live before you really "know". And now I know that the reality of love is it doesn't always come effortlessly, and it is hard work each day, and sometimes more often than I ever thought possible it lays bare all the hiding sinful tendencies of myself {you know those lines from "You've Got Mail"? Do you ever feel you've become the worst version of yourself? That a Pandora's box of all the secret, hateful parts ... has sprung open?} and weeds grow if I don't tend my marriage and work daily to love my husband better as I vowed.

But this knowing the reality of love—it gives me a deeper, more real sense of how blessed {and extremely thankful} I am to be married to someone who puts his heart and life into our marriage and who loves like Christ as much as any imperfect man ever could.


[Linking up with Lisa-Jo Baker for Five Minute Friday]


  1. I love your comparison of love to a garden...especially today on Valentine's Day. Love is certainly not easy. But working on loving my husband everyday makes that love even more deeper and meaningful. Taking the time to weed out the bad stuff and add provide a safe nurturing environment is what helps the plant {or love} thrive most.

  2. I know this all too well, as you do, that love is hard work and needs cultivating. You wrote it so well! Thank you for your post! Visiting from fmf.

  3. I love this analogy, and yes it is so true. It's a deeper love and requires deeds and action, not just emotion. Thanks for sharing!